Ups and Downs

Up: I just aced a test in Sociology. It's no big feat - it was 33 of the most over-the-plate multiple choice questions I've ever had the pleasure of answering. The professor (probably not actually a professor, I sometimes think that ACC just pulls folks off the street to teach) is like an adorably bumbling teddy bear. He tells a joke like every other minute of class, about 75% of the jokes fall flat, and a good percentage of the rest just get the pity left. It's tragic, but he doesn't let it bring him down, and I say good on him for trying.

Down: Not looking forward to writing another paper for Dr. Pomakoy's history class. I had to do one over the summer and it wasn't so much fun. I feel like every other "professor" at ACC is teaching a BOCES course, and this guy's teaching a graduate course. But, I guess I can't complain when 5 of my 6 classes are cakewalks.

Up: I'm really digging T'ai Chi. Moreso than I even thought I would. It's the one and only class that I don't entertain skipping, and that I don't get bored by the end. I've actively avoided buying books for the classes I can't get away with it - I've actively sought out resources for T'ai Chi outside of the syllabus. It's only been a few weeks, but I can feel the T'ai Chi movements sort of creeping into my normal posture, and it feels inexplicably cool and randomly graceful. Thumbs up.

Down: My other Phys. Ed. course, Fitness and Conditioning, I'm a little more wary about. I'm by far the most of out of shape guy in the class, so despite the class not really being competitive, it still can be a bit embarrassing. Ironically, I ended up skipping the class on Monday because I was too sore from working out with Tae Bo and DDR the night before.

Up: I built a new computer, pretty much. I knew stuff about computer hardware before, but I'd always been intimidated by the motherboard and it's sundry accouterments. Turns out it was nothing to worry about. My original plan was to salvage as much of my old machine as I could, but in the end the only thing I ended up saving was my hard drive and my trusty 56k modem. Since the new motherboard obsoleted some of my old peripherals, I had to replace a lot, but ultimately I ended up with a much more powerful, compact, and quiet machine. Not to mention the sense of accomplishment of having built it myself.

Down: Fucking Steam. I would be lying if I said I didn't build my machine to be a gaming rig, and generally I'm pretty happy with it. I got to finish Bioshock the way it was meant to be played, and I'll be able to revisit Oblivion and some other games as well. I picked up Half-Life 2: Episode 1 for $10 at Gamestop today for another treat... but Steam is just a pain in my ass. I had the same sort of issues when I bought the original HL2. Not only do I have to download updates on my dial-up connection to be able to access my game, but for some reason Steam always fucks up the install. I have the game on a DVD. Why? Why do I need to go through Steam to play my single-player off-line game?

Up: Not much new in the rock scene lately, but some good rap music hit the charts recently. I picked up the new albums from Kanye West, Talib Kweli and Pharaoh Monche in this past month. All of them are pretty solid, Kweli's "Eardrum" is especially a standout. I might go over it in more detail later, but by far "Eardrum" has the most consistent and lively production of any of Kweli's albums - and of course the BKMC delivers on the lyrical front.

Down: I'm a tad disappointed in Kanye's album. I wasn't in love with the production on the first listens. It seemed like a really mixed bag, but it eventually grew on me - and there are certainly some really outstanding beats to be had. My problem has more to do with the content. It's not that Kanye or anyone else has to always be meaningful - and certainly "The Louis Vuitton Don" isn't always coming from the "heal the world" angle. "Graduation," though, is a bit too much of the materialistic, flashy braggart style of rap that I'm not crazy about. It's not anything too offensive, but I guess I was just expecting something a wee bit different.

Up: I feel good. For a long time, I would've said that I was happy, but as I alluded to previously, I was just complacent. Almost like a drugged stupor, minus the drugs. It was really more of an absence of sadness than a real happiness, just a void of feeling. While I can't say I'm 100% happy now, I feel more generally positive than I have in a long time.

Down: See my last two posts. In T'ai Chi class yesterday, Intructor Li was telling a Chinese humor story to elucidate one of the Dao philosophies on which T'ai Chi is built. The short version - fortune and misfortune come hand in hand. As I noted previously, my break-up with Vicki was an impetus for a very positive change... but it's also a devastating loss that I'm trying to counteract. I do believe it was a necessary thing to "wake me up", and the break-up itself is ultimately a blessing in disguise. That said, now that I feel I am on the road to "recovery," so to speak, there's nothing I'd like to do more than share that with Vicki, and that may just be an impossibility.

Up: Never good to end on a down-note, eh? To counteract that final, and most heinous of downs, I only have the one defense: faith. I guess you can say I've always been lucky. Things just tend to work out for me. For a long time, things worked out for me in spite of my best efforts to fuck them up. Now, with this new-found state of positivity, I feel like my track record can only get better from here. I've just got this feeling, and it's a good one.